Marital harmony: tragedy of a couple

By Janet Shin

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Choosing a suitable spouse is one of the most important decisions to lead a happy life. We all try to meet someone who will be a faithful companion throughout our life journey. Couples reach marriage, sometimes through true love, or sometimes under the other conditions. Whatever the reasons are, they ultimately wish to live a happy married life. This, seemingly easy wish is actually the most difficult thing in our life. Why is that?

We humans are not perfect. Everybody has their own drawbacks and sometimes hidden trauma. When it is explained by a saju perspective, it is because we have only four pillars, not five pillars of destiny. The cosmos and every being in the cosmos are explained by yin, yang and the five elements. It is because the five elements (and yin and yang) have been considered the most appropriate energy, relationship and activity to constitute the universe. They are not only physical substances but spiritual existences and phenomena. However humans, being endowed with only four pillars of destiny, are always lacking energy to complete a harmonious life.

If one's destiny is like this, imperfect, it would be more difficult and yet important to meet a lifetime companion. It is difficult because it is an addition of one more incomplete life. It is important because one's life can be complemented by the other's saju. If one knew this philosophical background, one must read the marital harmony, or "gunghap", in Korean before marriage. Marriage is one of the most important events in one's life. Many people want to read their gunghap, but not everyone understands why they should read it.

Gunghap applies to the marital harmony as well as human relations in general. If you are to start a business and it is associated with other parties, it is highly recommended to read the gunghap between you and your partners. It is also read for family members, such as between a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law or between a father and son and so on.

There was an interesting TV show, which tried to understand saju or destiny in a more logical way. In that show, a couple's saju was introduced. They finished their married life miserably because the husband murdered his wife. Below is their saju.

The husband was born with the energy of yin metal, which was often represented by jewelry. But when the yin metal is born in a cold water month, it is more like a sharp knife. On top of the month branch, his saju has additional water and metal elements. Even the earth in the time branch is a frozen earth including lots of moisture. Unfortunately, the only fire element in his month stem has been diminished by the flood of water. The fire element is described as courtesy, law and norms. So the dimmed fire element implies a high possibility of his committing illegal acts. Having three metal letters, the same energy as the day master, indicates selfishness.

Now, if we turn our attention to the wife's saju, we can see her day master is yang water, surrounded by lots of earth elements in all four branches. The earth element represents her career star, which also implies her husband. They are penalized among themselves. Without reading the marital harmony between the two, we can see that the husband was born to be ruthless and the wife born to live a hard life due to the existence of her husband.

If I am asked whether this man is a good match for the woman, I would definitely say no. On the other hand, if asked whether this woman is a good match for the man, my answer is again, no. However, I still can advise that a fire day master is a more appropriate match for the man, and water and wood day masters are more appropriate matches for the woman.

It is sad that the couple's marriage ended in tragedy but it would be more abject if they knew that the wife had certain misfortune engraved in her life and the same destiny is foreseen in the husband's saju.

Information: Are you interested in learning more about the ancient Chinese teaching about the "Four Pillars of Destiny?" For further information, visit Janet's website at www.fourpillarskorea.com, contact her at 010-5414-7461 or email janetshin@hotmail.com.

The writer is the president of the Heavenly Garden, a saju research center in Korea, and the author of "Learning Four Pillars".